Is this a douche move?
Both shops are good.
For comparison's sake (I'll change the jobs a bit so as not to be obvious in terms of my identity):
One is Global Capital Markets at an established BB (initially my first choice) and the other is Advisory/M&A at a boutiqe bank which has been doing very well for the past 2 years.
Now the dilemna is that the BB took a long time to finalize their decision (didnt say yes or no) and I panicked and once I got the advisory gig I was only given over a week or so and in the end I had no choice but to accept it or let it go (they were fairly clear about it.) The boutique did sort of wine and dine me an actually have been pursuing me and doing a lot to get me on the team. (tbh I felt very flattered.) But now barely a couple of days after I gave my confirmation the BB has come up with an offer. It is very well established and has a great track record in exit opps. (Goal is B-school in 2 years and then PE) And while the deals the boutique has been doing are great and definitely a couple of them are eye popping, for the BB these are routine things. So its def a safer bet in terms of being guaranteed spots in interesting projects.
What would you monkeys suggest.
Renege on the boutique offer and sign with the BB. What are the repurcussions. Do higher ups talk about this to each other that in the future this may come back to haunt me?
I also feel very bad from an ethical standpoint that not only am I reneging on an offer but I am doing this to a great team and esp one of the senior guys who has been great to me at all times and has gone above and beyond to ensure that I sign for the team. (tbh I didnt really understand the fact that after the offer THEY are pursuing me. Theres a lot of things which I would say make me little more than a good candidate.) To top it off the opportunity to interview at the group was through networking and the guy who was my contact point may end up getting pissed off at me too that he put his reputation on the line to stick his neck out for me to get an interview.
I have talked to a few people about it. One thing which sort of stood out was what a mentor of mine (was in IB till Associate level till he decided one day that he is done with this and moved totally out of finance) said when I told him this dilemna. He said these IB's are cut throat and when they make decisions to fire people they dont give a rats ass about emotions of the people concerned and thus we (employees) are under no obligation for this either. He said accept it and even start it as the BB start date is not yet told and could be as late as november. And when the BB confirmation is done just resign and leave. Anyone agree with this.
(Sorry it maybe a rambling post and some of it might not make sense because I tried to mantain my anonymity due to paranoia I have that someone relevant might read this)